Facing Fears...Jay Style

So I guess while I was facing my worst fears at the doctor's office on Wednesday (see previous blog), Jay was facing his thousands of miles above the earth. Of course, some background is required here.

Jay has a little problem with claustrophobia. The main problem with his fear is feeling trapped...I guess that's what this phobia is, but let me explain a bit further. In the past, he's developed a problem with flying. It's not the flying that causes my calm, laid back husband to fly into unbelievable fits of rage, but not being in control and/or not being able to get off the plane when he wants to. As long as he can see out the window while flying, and he can be near the front to get off the plan as soon as possible once they've landed, everything goes smoothly.

However, in the past before he realized the conditions that needed to be in place to remain calm, we had several not so pretty incidents. Early on in our marriage, before I was even aware Jay had any phobias, we were headed home to Maryland for Christmas. With parents living so far away, these times were/are very precious to me. I was happily reading a book on our leg from Springfield to Chicago when I started noticing that Jay was a little tense. We were on a rather tiny plane and it was dark outside. Jay leaned over and asked me to sing to him. "Weird," I thought, but I indulged him and sang something quietly while he rested his head on my shoulder.
We soon landed, but had to sit on the plane for awhile...we were in Chicago after all where nothing is ever on time or running smoothly. As we waited, Jay began to panic and at some point leaned over and said, "I've got to get off this f***ing plane." Note: Jay doesn't cuss...ever! At this point I was really concerned! I tried to calm him down as best I could scared that he would do something stupid and we would never get home, and thankfully we didn't have to wait much longer.

When we got off the plane and Jay was back to normal, he told me that he was just going to rent a car and drive to Maryland meeting me there. He was dead serious. We really didn't have that much time in Maryland to begin with and I wasn't about to spend the majority of my Christmas with my husband driving across country to avoid planes! I told him so rather forcefully and let him know that he was in fact going to get on the plane and go home with me for Christmas...end of story. He got the point, and reluctantly climbed on to a thankfully bigger plane that produced no more incidents on that trip.

Over the years, Jay has had to travel more and more via air and has found a variety of ways to make these trips much less stressful. But of course, things can't be perfect all the time.

So on Wednesday as Jay was flying to Cedar Rapids, Iowa with his boss for business, another incident occurred...this time a rather hilarious one.

Close to landing time, Jay headed towards the bathroom. Pushing the bi-fold door in, he turned to shut the shoddily constructed door and struggled with the alignment of it but finally got it closed. As he also struggled with the lock, he finally gave up assuming everyone had seen him walk to the bathroom and wouldn't try to walk in on him. Still nervous about not locking the door and being walked in on, Jay quickly went to the bathroom constantly alert.

But when he tried to open the supposedly unlocked door, it wouldn't budge. Pulling as hard as he could, he immediately began to panic and started jerking the door. Finally he began knocking and yelling for help. Hearing the man sitting just on the other side get up and start to push on the door, Jay backed up waiting for rescue. The door still wouldn't budge. The man paused and Jay started yelling again, this time saying, "PUSH! PUSH!" The man jiggled the door a little more. Then finally said, "It's locked."

In that split second, Jay realized that he had indeed locked the door, the bathroom lights were on, which they wouldn't have been if the door had been unlocked, and he looked like a complete fool! Sliding the lock back, he easily opened the door, and most likely with a red face, headed back to his seat near the front to the very audible snickers and laughs coming from those at the back of the plane. When he neared his boss' seat, she said, "Was that you back there making all that raucous?"

I felt much better about my "brush with death" with the needle that afternoon after hearing Jay's story. At least I didn't act like a crazy person! Ah...fears! What great stories they create!